DailyRi 011: The Difference Between Pride & Dignity
I USED TO BE A PRETTY PRIDEFUL PERSON. IT RULED OVER ALL OF MY INTERACTIONS WITH OTHERS.
RECENTLY, I REALIZED THAT, ALL ALONG, I SHOULD HAVE BEEN CHOOSING DIGNITY INSTEAD.
what's the difference? well, after reflecting on the roles that these things have played in my life, i've learned that pride & ego are just a disguise for fear. i realized that i had truly been looking for dignity: a deep & unwavering understanding of my power & worth. dignity is self love, self respect, & humility, whereas pride can look like vanity & deep insecurity (two things that, in my opinion, are synonymous).
i wrote a lengthened post on here about how pride is paralyzing, so i recommend reading that if pride is an issue for you. either way, here is a shorter, more recent take on this topic.
understanding the difference between pride & dignity has been an absolute game-changer for me. although reacting from pride & dignity can, in some situations, look identical, the motive & overall feeling attached to these similar reactions could not be more different. for example, in romantic relationships, if a man shows me that he does not value me, i will always decide to walk away. my gate just looks way more graceful now that i'm dignified.
here is the difference explained: when i was acting from a place of ego/pride, i would have walked away out of fear. i would have been terrified to get hurt, & i would have been embarrassed (of course, disguising those feelings by acting unfazed or careless). in the aftermath, i would have taken it personally & possibly thought negatively about the other person (& myself).
now that i'm acting from a dignified place, my decision to walk away would come from a desire to uphold my self respect. the only thing i would be afraid of is spending time with a man who god didn't choose for me; i’d be afraid to waste both of our time. in the aftermath, i would not take it personally because nothing is personal, & i most certainly would not feel any negative feelings about the other party or myself.
ACTING FROM A PLACE OF DIGNITY IS ALWAYS A WIN-WIN.