The "Reel" Reasons I'm Off Social Media ft. My Second-Ever Youtube Video!
relevant fact: I AM ON A SOCIAL MEDIA CLEANSE.
SEEMINGLY IRRELEVANT BUT ACTUALLY VERY RELEVANT FACT:
i had a bunch of business school pre-work due today (i start at ross this fall! yay!), and one of our assignments was to record a three minute video explaining how to do something....anything (it was actually really fun). they said they wanted to assess our communication skills and they told us we could be creative. so i took them up on it and decided to talk about something i could repurpose for my channel. and then i realized that the content is surprisingly relevant to why i decided to go on my social media cleanse. so i decided to include it in this post too.
BUT ENOUGH READING, GO listen to me talk.
and then come back to finish Reading this post.
(While you're there feel free to like, share, comment on and/or subscribe to my youtube channel.)
i hope you enjoyed the video & i'm glad you came back.
so, now the "reel" reasons i'm off social media.
Originally, I thought I would cleanse from all socials for a week - giving myself a bit of space away from instagram and snapchat (the only two apps i really use). i figured i would trade that time in for more alone time and introspection. after only my first day on the cleanse, i decided that i wanted it to last longer than a week and decided i would spend the rest of my trip in lebanon cleansing from all socials.
1- GOD TOLD ME TO
i write about god a lot, 1- because....god. 🤷🏻♀️and 2- because i have really been focusing on my relationship with the most high over the last year. sometimes i don't share my experiences with god because i think people will think they're insane (sometimes i'm blown away by how clear some of the signs i get are). but i'm in the sharing mood, so here goes:
i was laying in bed in a meditative state, thinking about the areas i am trying to find some clarity in. like i mentioned in the video, i like using my mind and heart to make big decisions or changes in my life. when i can't seem to get them on the same page, i take the time i need to do so. that's what this month in lebanon was for: to be as clear-minded as possible before school starts this fall.
after being in this reflective state for a half hour, i open my eyes, immediately reach for my phone, and post a couple IG/Snap stories announcing my social media cleanse and how to keep up with my blogs while i'm off socials. just like that. the decision seemed to make itself. i didn't plan for it. i didn't take more time to think about it.
and that's how i know it came from god. i asked for clarity, and he urged me to remove the biggest hindrance to me achieving this synergy between heart and mind.
moments later, as i was laying in my bed, lebanon experienced a minor earthquake. it was so crazy! my whole bed started rocking. i wasn't scared, but i was honestly so shook (no pun intended). i decided to take it as a sign from god that i did the right thing. that something groundbreaking was going to happen (pun intended).
2- I NO LONGER WANTED TO BE "HERE" AND "THERE" SIMULTANEOUSLY
i am in lebanon for a month. i was so excited to get away. my father, grandfather and grandmother are buried here. i was anxious to be here, especially before this next big chapter in my life. i am most deeply and intimately rooted in lebanon - it's no wonder i feel closest to myself here.
so, i needed to be here - in this life - becoming the person i need to be for that life.
i have always felt this way about lebanon - like it offers me a chance at a new life. like i can cross oceans and leave behind the baggage that i'm working through in the states. it feels especially like that now that my father is buried here, because baba has always been my northern star in this way, a constant reminder of the light that i can still tap into.
while i love how connected i feel to my loved ones despite the distance, being "too connected" to what was happening in the states actually made me disconnected from the right things. i found myself constantly on social media, responding to dms and comments, posting pics, watching and posting stories galore - put simply, i wasn't taking full advantage of my time here and i certainly wasn't staying true to my goal in coming here. i don't want to be "here" and "there" well, because "there" isn't going anywhere. like i mentioned in my mini-episode - i knew i needed to tune out to truly tune in.
3- MY PERSONAL BRAND NEEDED RE-EVALUATION
"but i have a brand to promote!!!" <- that was my excuse for excessive social media engagement.
but, i had to realize that my so-called personal brand is not my website. it's not @roadtorima. it's not my stories on social media. it's not pictures and captions. my personal brand is who i am at my core. all of those mediums are merely platforms through which i can impact others by putting pieces of my mind and heart (i.e. my true personal brand) on display. but to truly be impactful, my brand has to be "for me, for me, for me" before it could ever be "for them," too - whoever "they" may be.
i want to create deeply positive impact on as many people as possible. but in miss lauryn's words "how you gonna win if you ain't right within?" i have a lot of lofty goals and ambitions that will enable me to achieve this impact, and i've decided that i will continue building my brands while i'm in school. this is really only the beginning.
but i needed to get my mind and heart on the same page, so i'm engaging in a longer-lasting "three days of clarity." and yes, brand promotion is important, but if that brand is misguided, all i'm doing is promoting more confusion and internal conflict. i'll be under construction until i can make sure what i promote is aligned with my true personal brand.
4- FOR ME, FOR ME, FOR ME.
i just read a great article about the value of introspection/self awareness and how technology often hinders us from working through our internal conflicts. a week ago, i probably would not have made it through the full article without checking my phone 3-4 times. why? why was i so tuned in? why did i care who commented on my picture and who swiped over on my story?
because i'm still looking for validation - that's why.
caring less about this validation is exactly what my whole #forme movement is about. i guess i figured because i spent a lot of time alone, that i naturally was more inclined towards doing things for and because of my own desires, but in reality, i wasn't really "alone" if i was immersed in my social media (emphasis on social).
i am inherently social. i have a platform. i care what people think - i kind of have to. i have this platform because i want people to read what i write. i want to post things that provoke thought and critical discourse. that's what i'm about, and that's what i'll always be about. and that's cool af.
but i needed to care about the right things and not really care about the wrong things. i was caring about some of the wrong things. and as long as we have not worked through other motivations behind posting certain things (preoccupation with image, wanting any form of validation from others), we will continue caring about (and promoting) the wrong things. why? because these platforms become a vicious cycle, distracting ourselves and those watching us from uprooting toxic thoughts entirely.
so those are my "reel" reasons for being off socials this month.
who knows where it will take me. my eyes are focused on the prize, so i'll let myself make my own rules as i go along.
and if you're feeling a lack of clarity anywhere in your life, you should too.
at least until we can find a level of engagement that honors our potential, honors god, and honors our life's purpose. we are too important and unique and powerful to be doing things because so-and-so is watching. even if "so and so" (aka "they") are our secondary audience. our purpose is so much more important than so-and-so's validation. tune out to tune in, dig and reflect and prioritize direction over decision. let's get our minds and hearts on the same page. we need to be this protective of our process because this is the only way we can ever be our best selves for others.
AND YES LOVE, I PROMISE YOU IT iS THAT SERIOUS.
AFTER ALL, IF WE DON'T TAKE OURSELVES SERIOUSLY, WHO WILL?